So I was watching Robocop 3 the other day and realised that in most scifi movies the future sucks. Not in the aliens attack/nuclear holocaust way but in a "I can't believe how crappy 'future' tech is" way.

Apparently the answer to law enforcement problems is to take a dead cop and turn him into a robot. You might say that seems to be a good idea. After all when you need to bust shoplifters it's a good idea to have a super complicated, highly specialized, expensive cyborg. I mean those replacement parts have got to be expensive. If the alternator from a Kia cost 400.00 I can only imagine what robocop parts cost. You won't find those at the junkyard.

Seems like somebody got some kickbacks for that deal. But aside from the expense it's got to be good right? I mean robots think, move, and do everything faster than a human right? Wrong. Not this one. The likelyhood of getting caught by robocop is about equal to a stuffed animal being caught by the crane from the claw machine. Well...actually the claw machine is quicker I think. But at least he thinks fast right? Well as fast as a 386 computer can anyway. And a giant 500 pound robot is not exactly Mr Stealth. He's not sneaking up on anybody. The only thing he's got going for him is...um...nothing. Robocop is kind of like Chris Tucker in Rush Hour except not funny or black or human and he doesn't have a corvette. Other than that they are exactly the same.

But then again the "enemy" isn't much better. I mean the movie had swat type bad guys that dressed like SWAT, were armed like SWAT, except they so obviously weren't. I'm no tactical combat person but I don't think if you have 12 guys with automatic weapons rush into a room from all directions including through windows, the ceiling etc that they should just hold the trigger down and spray the room with bullets in every direction. They don't even aim. They just spray the room like they have garden hoses. Luckily they only killed one or two people. Good thing for the "good guys" that those SWAT guys didn't actually aim before they fired.

There was lots of luck in this movie.

Luckily Robocops arm was sliced off perfectly in such a way that a random weapon fit onto his arm and he was able to control it somehow. Don't question it...that's how robots work!

Luckily the strings that were holding robocop up didn't break when he flew around. And yes they cables were VERY visible. I think somebody forgot to edit those out.

Luckily the "bad guys" didn't fall off the moving box van that they were firing from. Because when I assault a group of gun wielding homeless people I want to be standing 10 feet above ground on a moving object with no cover.

Luckily the bad guys didn't notice that the good guys only barricaded half of the street (you know just the part that fit into the shot) otherwise they could have drove behind the barricade and killed everybody.

I could go on for hours about the "awesomeness" of this movie but I won't. Instead I will use this time to search for a DVD copy of "Cool as Ice" which I hear is quite entertaining to watch. If you have one let me know or if you see it I want to know where.
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